QA166 QUESTION: I’m terribly proud and also feel a great deal of difficulty in exposing a certain sense I have that “they’re all people; I’m not a person,” or something like that. I’m not even a creature. I’m strange sort of, you know? I also have fear of being thought insane, and fear that nobody can share this kind of thinking.
ANSWER: You experience your perceptions, your fears, you mean?
ANSWER: Yes, I think it is very good that you have come to the point where you can sit here and say this.
QUESTION: This isn’t hard to say.
ANSWER: Well, perhaps you do not realize that it is. Because there was much more defensiveness in you about this. By being able to say this, you will be able to destroy the illusion that you are so separate from others. And you will dissolve the fear you just expressed by really seeing, owning up to and expressing exactly what you feel, and no longer using various defenses with which you deny this. In a way, you set yourself above others while you really mean you feel you are below them in certain ways, as you just said.
Now, the more one alienates oneself from others and therefore also from one’s self by such pretenses and guards, the more the false fearsome belief is fortified. Therefore you cannot come out of it. And I say to you, you will, very relatively speaking, quite soon, get relief in this respect.
You will see yourself a little bit differently, especially now beginning on a more intensive path in this work here, privately and in group. You will very soon see things differently. You have made a beginning – and it is but a beginning – and the isolation you live with inside of yourself will not be as stubborn as you may think now.
It may not need to be maintained as long as it may appear at first sight, once you have fully recognized everything that plays into this.