QA177 QUESTION: I want to ask a question about my speech problem – why I have it, and what I can do about it.
ANSWER: Yes. Well, I say you are already doing about it the best you can possibly do about it, and that is the real openness with which you search and grow and develop. And it has already improved, as you know, considerably, most of the time.
The fact that you still have remnants of it is because certain of your fears and inhibitions and self-rejections are still there. They still exist. But the tremendous fear is primarily the cause – that you will make a fool of yourself, that you are not acceptable to people.
This tremendous fear is always there when you are in contact with other people. Also what is behind it is a tremendously strong desire that this may not happen, that you will be accepted, and the doubt that you were accepted. I would say there is almost a certainty in yourself that you cannot be accepted. This is very strong in you, this idea.
Of course, it is totally wrong. But as you begin to come out of your confusions – and you have already obtained so much in the time since you are on the Pathwork – the fact that you have not yet come to the point where you can be free and loving and sure of yourself is very normal, very natural, because the obstructions take time. It takes effort to look in from all sides and to acclimatize the whole being into a new way of operating.