QA238 QUESTION: In the past number of months since I’ve opened up my feelings towards men, I’ve been experiencing a gnawing feeling in my stomach or solar plexus. It gets very bad at times. I feel that somehow it’s connected to a frustration, a demand, a grabbiness that says “I’ll never get it; I must have it now.” When it starts to happen, it seems to take over and a franticness happens.

ANSWER: My suggestion about how to deal with it is, first of all, to fully accept that feeling. Your difficulty arises because you want to push the feeling away, and that is exactly the opposite road you need to go. You need to fully embrace the feeling, sink into the feeling, and explore it openly. Allow it to be – in a spirit of interest and curiosity and trust.

Trust that it too is a tunnel that can only bring into further light. The more you battle against the feeling, the more ferociously the feeling will hook into you. The more you go with it and accept it and do not fear it, the more it will dissolve into some other feeling that will become bearable.

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